ADAM’S APPLE | Episode 1


As I rolled on d bed and opened my left eye to steal a glance at the wall clock, I silently wished there was still time – time to rest some more – I was so tired after the romp of the previous night.

It was a memorable night with Valerie. She was the most exciting partner I ever had, she was too skillful in bed and was a horse; never tired. She used every bit of strength in me till I begged her to stop.

The wall clock spoke in the most dreadful language; it was already quarter past seven. I jumped up and looked at the other side of the bed, Valerie was gone. I ran to the bathroom, she wasn’t there, none of her belongings remained.

“Hmmm… This girl. Full of surprises.” I said to myself as I rubbed my head and gave myself a silent pat on the back for a job well done.

Valerie was one of my toughest catch, but she gave me a happy ending. I remember that sunny saturday afternoon when I took to twitter to vent my anger after being ignored by caterers at a party I attended. I had returned home in anger, and had to fill my belly to the brim with a plate of rice and chicken which I got at Sweet Sensation on my way back home.

I was seething with anger, and I tweeted “The worst punishment is to be active in a party and still miss out on food!” Within a few minutes, my tweet was trending all over twitter. Different responses came from tweeps, I had about 300 retweets and 28 favourites. I also gained over 60 followers by that tweet!

My anger had metamorphosed into pure excitement. I was all over the place and tweeps were subbing me in their tweets. My seemingly silent twitter life blew open, and I was enjoying twitter all of a sudden.

But someone suddenly burst my bubble. I was going through my mentions when I saw a reply thus:

“STFU! Food Monger! RT @GregDinho The worst punishment is to be active in a party and still miss out on food!”

I was shocked. I looked at the handle and it was @inVALuable69. I quickly checked the avi and it was one of the most sexually exciting avatars I ever saw on twitter. The lady in the avatar was fair in complexion, and was wearing a blue lingerie, she was nude of course, but she had her fingers covering just her crotch, keeping away the sight of her privates from my seeking eyes.

“I must follow this bitch” I said to my self quickly, and before I knew what I was doing, I had typed “@inVALuable69 Kindly follow back. Please.”

I took a short tour through her tweets and I just knew she was the exact breed of bad girl I would love to keep as a girlfriend (note, girlfriend not wife). She had over 35,000 followers and was following just 2,589 people. I immediately told my self I would be number 2,590!

Days passed by, there was no response from @inVALuable69, she didn’t follow back but I kept seeing her tweets. I replied some of her tweets, but she didn’t even do anything as little as a retweet. Her erotic tweets only made me hunger for more, and I was determined to do anything… Anything at all to make her notice me…and probably follow me back.

Follow friday! Yes of course, that was the special day set apart on twitter for people to gain followers. I was up early on this particular friday. I quickly got set for work, and was in the bus to work when I saw her ‘good morning’ tweet. I jumped on the reply button quickly and replied, ‘good morning angel, how was your night’ and I waited like a hunter waiting for his prey to wander into sight. I kept refreshing my mentions after ten minutes, but didn’t see anything from @inVALuable69

In frustration, I tweeted at her thus, “will it take sacrificing the brain of a mosquitoe and the armpit of a frog to get a ff bk?” And like magic again, I was trending. And this time, it wasn’t just me… I was trending alongside @inVALuable69 because she replied thus: “bring a strand of hair on your mother’s p***y, and I’ll follow you back”

The whole twitter went agog, as everyone was talking about a twitfight between @GregDinho and @inVALuable69. Well, even if it was truly a twitfight, I wasn’t winning, because my meager 1,684 followers can’t match her 35,024 followers who were all retweeting and replying with all sorts of ‘LOL’ ‘LMFAO’ ‘ROTFL’ etc.

After more than an hour, I had to give up on @inVALuable69. I reluctantly hit the unfollow button, and just faced my work for the day. But I was not happy, I felt hurt, and felt like I had lost someone special. I took one last look at her avatar and couldn’t help my dick from going hard. I wanted this girl so bad, but I just didn’t know how to get her or what to do to get her….

To be continued next week…….

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About Olumide Lawrence

OLUMIDE LAWRENCE is a writer, an artiste and a publicist. Started out as a PLAYER, now I am a Relationship COACH. Follow me on twitter @ilummynation and instagram @glowville Facebook: Olumide ilummynation Lawrence. BBM: 2A3B059E, 7E15126B.

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